Sunday, 16 January 2011


It's been snowing here quite a lot recently which consequently meant Thursday was spent snowboarding and a thirty minute wait for an unusually late bus home, resulting in snow wrestling and rolling and basically behaving like a small child. Realised that snow is much more fun when you are not wet and/or cold - I shall never venture out into it without snow pants etc ever again, although I have a feeling that after this season English snow will always fall flat. (And mushy and disgusting...)

Wondering what the title is? It's my paycheck for this week. I'm not even joking, I got paid $27 to live on. For two weeks. We got double rent taken off this time (because our boss forgot to take rent last paycheck, which in my opinion is his problem not ours...) and as I've got my ski pass & security deposit deductions still coming off I kind of expected it, but that didn't stop me from being in an utter state of shock for at least half an hour after opening it... Talk about being poor! The ironic thing is I didn't even get the whole $27, because as a result of cashing the cheque in I had to pay a bank charge of $22... Sad day! I mean, I didn't come here to have a lot of money in any way at all, but I'd like enough to live on! 

Strange that I actually don't feel too worried though - I mean I have a roof over my head, my ski pass and some food left in the cupboards. Even if that doesn't last me, I have friends who aren't going to let me go hungry! (And then there's always the option of eating free food from work, one which I have taken advantage off and therefore it's been shepard's pie for dinner for the past two days). Apart from food, I really don't feel the need for money. It's so liberating to feel like you don't need it! It would be nice to have it, of course, because then I could maybe get a new helmet or ice skates - but I don't feel the need to have anything here the way I usually do back home, in terms of clothes/magazines/makeup/general things like that. It's nice. Still, though - $27!!!!!

Feeling quite... strange, today. It's not good for me to be sat on my own in my room I don't think, as familiar and unshakable pangs of apathy and loneliness leading to paranoia tend to settle in. I need to  deal with it though, and I don't think I should be ashamed to think these things - although   in two days I will probably highly regret splashing this all over my blog... Oh well, there was always going to be ups and downs wasn't there, and I started writing this to document everything. Learning to be happy with yourself is difficult. 

No comments:

Post a Comment